Fun with KSAs

Sure, the Obama administration wants to do away with the Knowledge, Skills and Abilities statements that have drawn so much ire among those who've gone through the federal hiring process. But KSAs aren't quite gone yet. And while they're still around, some people have decided to have some fun with them.

At GovLoop, user GeekChick says that while vacancy announcements at her agency, the Forest Service, have become increasingly generic lately due to standardization and centralization of HR processes, they occasionally include KSAs that get very specific. For example, she came across an opening that included a requirement that applicants describe their "knowledge of microbiological science principles, theories, concepts, methods, and techniques."

GeekChick couldn't resist putting her tongue firmly in cheek in her response:

I possess a degree in biology, which included the basic instruction in microbiology. I am familiar with the concepts of growing samples in petri dishes, and in fact, am quite knowledgeable in conducting such experiments in my refrigerator. I have determined the length of time required for certain microorganisms to grow and which media they prefer to colonize (yogurt, cheese, sauces, etc). I recently have discovered a previously unknown organism, which had an unusual red color instead of the standard green and white. I also routinely conduct "dry" experiments, such as on bread in a cupboard.

In addition to simple growth experiments, I am also familiar with common sample collection techniques, such as skimming or cutting from the surface. This allows one to salvage the remainder of the growth medium for consumption or for future experiments.