The Interior Secretary Went to Work on Horseback. Here’s How Other Cabinet Secretaries Should Commute

Newly confirmed Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke arrived at work in novel fashion Thursday: astride a horse. Flanked by mounted U.S. Park Police officers, the cowboy-hatted Zinke rode through the streets of Washington like he was back home in Montana.

This got me thinking: Outside of Zinke, Cabinet secretaries have shown a distinct lack of imagination when it comes to how they commute. So here are some unsolicited suggestions:

• State: In a horse-drawn carriage, with footmen
• Treasury: By armored truck
• Justice: In a police cruiser
• Agriculture: Riding atop a tractor (it wouldn’t be the first time someone took to the streets of D.C. in one)
• Commerce: Via Uber or Lyft
• Labor: On the subway, like a regular working stiff
• Defense: Driving a tank (while making sure to avoid the Mike Dukakis look)
• Health and Human Services: In the back of an ambulance
• Housing and Urban Development: By using Bikeshare
• Transportation: Gotta use ‘em all: plane, train, and automobile
• Energy: Via solar-powered car
• Education: On a school bus, of course
• Veterans Affairs: In an official Veterans Transportation Service vehicle
• Homeland Security: In a helicopter (preferably black)