Be Realistic About Your Successes and Failures

Take a moment to think back on the leadership successes and failures you have experienced. Ask yourself, “Who is responsible for my successes?” and then, “Who is responsible for my failures?” Think broadly as you ponder those questions.

It’s far too easy to take credit for success and blame others for failure. But if you are honest with yourself you might find that isn’t a realistic way to consider leadership journey. You need to have a realistic view of your role and empathy for others’ roles in your leadership so you can lead at your best. Consider:

People who helped you to be successful. There may be countless others who have helped you to get the work done, supported you, mentored you, set you on the right path when you strayed, and been your moral compass. Take time to acknowledge their role in your success. If they are still in your life, let them know you are grateful for their assistance in helping you to be the person and leader that you are.

People who failed with you. Those who are there in failure, fail with you. It’s tempting to blame them for the bad things that happen, but they need your support and respect because they may feel the failure every bit as much as you do. Help them to heal while acknowledging your share of the responsibility. Consider how they contributed in a positive way and let them know you are grateful for their support.

As a leader, people are watching for your responses to both success and failure. Look to yourself for the realistic role you play in success and failure while considering how others participated too.

Mary Jo Asmus is an executive coach and a recovering corporate executive who has spent the past 12 years as president of Aspire Collaborative Services, an executive consulting firm.